Looks like Rain Again!

Well, The FRG (family readiness group) has been making contact with every military spouse updating information for the upcoming deployment to Iraq again. I am grateful that we at least get the holidays together again. Our oldest will be in 11th grade and driving and our youngest will be in 1st grade when their father returns. It is hard to think about. You just don't get that time back. I often feel like I've missed out on so much with them, I just can't imagine. I know that my husband does it for his country and his family. I know it is honorable however, I am to the point that I don't want to share anymore. I don't want it to be "MY" family. I really don't want it to be anyones family.

I know what people are going to say," if we wouldn't have gone in ..in the first place." Bull! He would have been away for trainings and exercises regardless. And now, can you imagine leaving a country to fend for themselves after what they have been through? The question is not should we have gone in..it is what can we do for their people now? Would you simply walk away?

I am enjoying being a stay at home mom. I am taking care of myself and getting some things done that I should have done long ago. These days are numbered I am sure. I have been contacted about being a family counselor. I think it will be challenging position. I am sure it will also be rewarding. Eventually, I will be able to work from home and schedule my own sessions. I am sure it will be evenings and late calls here and there. Nothing that I can't handle. Have you ever had the opportunity to make a real difference in the life of a family? It is truely amazing. That is the pay off in the behavioral health field. There is no other reason.

Thank goodness that my children have family here that are willing to step up and care for them. It is good for them to spend time and build relationships with their family. They have never had the opportunity before. I sorta feel like I don't want to work because I want to be able to be there for everything. I have a hard time letting them go. They have always depended on me. We are all we have ever had. I didn't realize how much I depended on them. They are my rock, my entertainment, my drive...they are my everything...I know that it will benefit our family in many ways for me to work. I need to start letting go a little bit and allow other relationships to grow. Relationships in my professional life and in their lives can only add to our life journey.


Every relationship we enter into in our lives somehow affects us. Even if it is very teeny tiny. Sometimes they are very distrubing relationships, sometimes they may appear to mean nothing at the time and other times they are very rewarding from the onset. There is such a range. If we really think about it, even the tough ones that we sometimes wish we didn't have to endure are the most powerful tools used to create who we have become. Once healing begins, they have a place on our brain shelf of important information. We have the ability to identify these situations and turn them around in our lives to make them useful. I often consider them blessings once I can heal. They are wounds that with proper care can be cleansed and healed properly only leaving behind the minor scar that reminds us not to go there again!

Anyway, I am off to enjoy the rest of my day!